How Bad Do You Want It?
“How bad do you want it?”
That’s one of those things people tend to say whenever someone is faced with doing something or accomplishing a goal that is really difficult.
To some extent we are conditioned to think that if we “fail” we don’t want it bad enough. But I don’t think that’s it. What needs to be asked instead is WHY? Why do you want this thing, and what can accomplishing this goal help you feel?
I do think that sometimes you might think you want something more than you actually do. What I mean by that is you have a desire but you aren’t quite willing to do what’s needed to make it happen...not yet. It’s kind of like wanting to build a thriving business but not being quite ready to get out there and introduce you and your work to the people.
cue the*crickets*
I get it.
"How bad do you want it?" isn't really a helpful way to look at the success or "failure" of your desires because often there are other things going on that are blocking you from accomplishing what you think you want.
So, a better way of approaching goals is with this question: What do you want your life to look like?
What do you want to see when you look at your life?
What would feel exciting?
What are the action steps you can take to make that vision come true?
These questions are a whole lot more expansive than being backed into the corner of, "How bad do you want it?" Because, duh, You want it bad! You just don't know how to get it, how to get there from here. And maybe, "there" isn't even something YOU want. Rather, it's something you were told you needed to have...
…which is sort of like clothes shopping. The magazines told you to buy this when you really wanted to get that. We've all been there.
Heck, I’ve wanted the mid-90’s, ultra-light blonde, chin-length Donna Martin hair cut since middle school. Twenty-five years later, and in mid-life, I’m still fighting stylists to give it to me. Eventually, I back-off from my heart’s desire and submit to their “expertise”…but now that I live closer to the city of Portland perhaps I can find someone with some edge. The battle continues. Suggestions anyone?
Often, clients come to me feeling defeated about how they look, especially in past photos.
They don't like how they were told to pose. They don't know how to pose. The lighting looks awful. They look like stiff mannequins. They don't like what they are wearing. They were told they couldn’t wear their favorite pattern. They don't know what to wear. They don't know where to shop for what they might like to wear. And they don't know where to start with making any of the visibility changes they desire. They just know something has to change going forward because what they tried just ain't working. Gah!
Guess what? Those clients are in luck because I am in the business of visibility. My job is to make you look good while listening to what you want.
With looking good comes feeling good, and feeling good leads to taking action on your dreams. You want help reaching your dreams. I want to help you reach your dreams.
So, I invite you think about how much easier showing up for what you want (because you do want it bad enough) will be when you know you look good, when you’ve got the ‘look’ you’ve always dreamed of.
When you are confident in how you look, what might you go out and dare to do?
When you dare to do what you want, what in your life might change for you?
Here's your opportunity for a head start: if you have been thinking about a style overhaul this year have a look at my latest 1:1 offering Divine Capsule. Divine Capsule is designed to help you go from a closet of overwhelm to a divine collection of looks you love in a short period of time. Over the course of one month, we start with an astro-analysis of your natal chart and finish up with a clear plan for how to develop a stellar wardrobe.
During our time together, we also look under the astro-hood to uncover what has been blocking you from showing up as you really want. (Maybe it’s just been those stubborn stylists telling you what you can’t have.)
I ran some beta sessions of this offer last year, and let me tell you...we found all sorts of gold, not just in what was sent off to consignment, but in the newfound confidence to show up for one's life and business too.
Could this offering be the jumpstart to reaching your dreams? How bad do you want it?
Just kidding. Rather, what do you want your life to look like? Because in Divine Capsule, you will start designing it.
See you on the other side,
Xx J
How do you know if I’m the stylist for you?
To start, YOU are likely someone who is sensitive, creative, intuitive, cares for others and the earth, and yet still wants some bling in their closet. You aren’t interested in fast fashion trends, but rather you are someone who desires unique pieces with history. You want to be intentional about what you buy, and you view your wardrobe as an investment. You want to express your individual style and creativity. You aren’t here to fit into the basic b clique. 🤷🏼♀️
I’M the stylist that gives you the quick YES/NO (we don’t fluff around). I encourage vintage, independent designer, resale and investment pieces. Fast fashion is to be purchased with a slow fashion mindset. Quirk, edge, and the off-beat are embraced. Minimalism and Maximalism can live in the same wardrobe. I’ll show you how.